Domestic violence in Australia is on the rise. Women’s rights advocates are calling for a cultural shift away from the acceptance of domestic violence. Because, believe it or not: According to some surveys, one in five young men believed it was a right to hit a woman if they were drunk.
Support services for family and domestic violence:
- 1800 Respect national helpline 1800 737 732
- Women’s Crisis Line 1800 811 811
- Men’s Referral Service 1300 766 491
- Lifeline (24 hour crisis line) 131 114
- Relationships Australia 1300 364 277
Fiona McCormack, the CEO of Domestic Violence Victoria says we need to frame the deepening crisis in terms of power and justice.
The national average is a woman murdered every week by someone known to them.
All forms of violence against women are caused by the same factors, whether it occurs on the street or in the home and whether it’s perpetrated by a stranger or someone known.
- One in three Australian women will experience physical violence.
- Family violence is a key driver of 23 per cent of national homelessness in Australia.
- It comprises 40 per cent of police time.
- It’s a factor in over 50 per cent of substantiated child protection cases.
- Violence against women costs the Australian economy $13.6 billion every year.
The common denominator in most of these cases is gender.
This is something deeply cultural—a part of our history deeply ingrained in our collective psyche. It’s like we’re fish but we don’t see the water.
International research shows that violence against women occurs in countries across the world to a greater or lesser extent depending upon some key factors:
- Rigid adherence to gender stereotypes
- The status of women compared to men
- Our violence-supportive attitudes
Academically gender refers to social norms, the social expectations about the roles and rights of men and women in our society. Our expectations about men and women stem from a long cultural history and are essentially sexist.
Men who choose to use violence have hyper-masculine attitudes about their rights as men and the role and rights of women. They believe they have a right as men to behave this way and that it’s women who are to blame. Importantly, they see their partners and children as their possessions. That’s why we see so many women and children murdered as payback when women try to end a relationship.
A cultural aspect of how we define masculinity is that it is seen by many as something that has to be proved over and over. Men with hyper-masculine attitudes see it as critical that their masculinity isn’t doubted or challenged, which is why these attitudes are so problematic in the context of family violence. This is particularly so when women try to end a relationship and are made to pay. We would assess that about 50 per cent of the family violence the system deals with is post-separation violence, and it can go on for years.
This (the solution) isn’t about men being less than men. It’s about reshaping expectations of what it is to be a man, about shedding concepts of masculinity that have such a negative impact on us as a society, particularly when ‘being a bloke’ involves derogatory attitudes towards women. I think that can be another way in which masculinity can be reasserted or affirmed by some men—by engaging in disrespectful comments about or behaviours toward women when they are together. With the development of healthier interpretations of masculinity we’d see a range of benefits in terms of reducing street violence, rates of violence against young men and bullying.
There are many women who experience far higher rates of violence, and more extensive violence, than others: women with disabilities, Aboriginal women and women newly arrived to Australia. There’s a common myth that certain women seek out abusers as partners when the reality is that there are men who recognise there are few options for redress for certain women and take advantage of that fact.
So what would it take to deliver a just society?
At an individual level:
- We need zero tolerance of violence against women.
- We must understand violence against women as a choice.
This is not a sudden loss of temper or control. Many times it doesn’t even involve physical abuse. It’s usually experienced by women as a range of behaviours meant to intimidate and control. It’s a deliberate choice.
- We must understand these are everyday men.
So many women don’t recognise they’re in an abusive relationship until it’s reached crisis, especially if they’re not experiencing physical violence.
If we’re going to prevent murders, really it’s critical we start saying: ‘No matter how disaffected a man feels, no matter how hard done by the system he is, it’s never okay to harm or take the life of your partner or your child.’
- We need to challenge sexist or derogatory attitudes towards women.
Sometimes people can think they have to wait until they see a violent altercation before they can do something, but the reality is men particularly can play a major role in challenging the conditions that allow violence against women to flourish by challenging derogatory comments, sexist jokes, et cetera.
If we’re going to start preventing men from being violent in the first place, we need to challenge sexist attitudes and behaviours.
Violence is the ultimate expression of sexism
At a societal level:
We need to be intervening earlier. Providing women with information on the early warning signs is crucial because it also provides us with information on the patterns of control.
Some of those warning signs are:
- Is he resistant to you living an independent life?
- Is he resistant to you having your own bank account?
- Is he resistant to you socialising with friends independently?
- Is he overtly jealous? Does he monitor where you are and what you do?
- Is he respectful to you? He may be in the early stages but is he respectful to other women? Ex-girlfriends?